Can I jump yet?

Well, I can count on one hand how many times I have been so upset that I could jump off a bridge....but today would be one of those days! Now the river is down and the bridge isn't as high as it used to be, so with my luck of late, I would probably just get my head stuck in the muck at the bottom of the river...in an air hole...and just come up covered in mud and sore from the jump!

Murphy's law.....if anything can go wrong - it will. That is how I feel today. First of all we had the big let down of having to pack up and come home without getting the bone-marrow transplant. And are looking at more "Salvage-Chemo" ...lovely name....and it is as ugly as it sounds. We will start that tomorrow afternoon probably. Will see what the doc says atour appointment tomorrow at 2:30. But I know Mayo's wants it started as soon as possible so the tumors don't have a chance to start growing again. Dave and I both have a bad cold...well it is coming to a head about now, so I hope he is healthy enough to start the chemo. I had a fat lip while at Mayo's and accused him of belting me one in my sleep!! Guess it was just a cold infection as it almost gone now. Bummer. But it was actually a RELIEF to be able to come home and NOT have that awful treatment! However, we are only postponing it.
Then when we get home we find our son is wacko. Seems he is filled with anxiety and stress and can't keep his little job, can't go outside, can't function hardly at all. Now I really don't know what to do about that. He wants to go back to Virginia and perhaps that is best. I just don't know. I am going to try to get him to a doc to have his meds checked to make sure it isn't medication...but that is about all I can do. I am going with him to the psyc doc on Thursday if I can...(May have to pick Dave up from the hospital on Thursday) so not sure what else I can do.
Can I jump now?
So...now we must worry about what to do with the house, the dog etc. etc. when we go the next time if it really is going to be for two months! We had a good practice run at it and packed everything you could think you would need for two months...and it lasted great since we were only there for 5 days! What an exercise! Felt stupid taking three carts full of stuff when we had only been there 5days!
I think I will jump now!
In the mean time, we have to make plans to get Davey back on a bus and ship him back to West Va - after some testing of course. Not sure I will find out anything and the secretary at Wabash Valley already thinks that I am the one that needs a shrink!!
Maybe I better just jump and get it over with!!
And we took our boat in early....so now we are home and no boat!!!
DANG...if that isn't a good reason to jump I don't know what is!!
Well...enough of this.....I think it is just too far to walk up to the bridge and jump, so I am going to just go outside, sit on swing and have a non-alcoholic beer!!